she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
