Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
