I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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