If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
COCAINE IS GR8
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize