Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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