i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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