This house was built for laser tag.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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