Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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