the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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