I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.