Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Randomize
