We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Randomize
