You can't motorboat a personality
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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