They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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