He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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