I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
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