That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
