You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
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No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
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It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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