If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize
