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I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Randomize