well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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