do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize