So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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