it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
