Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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