I want to walk on stilts...naked
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
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