And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
