i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
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