You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
