hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Randomize