Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
