My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize