listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.