? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
