hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
