Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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