her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
