Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
