Whatcha textin bout Willis?
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
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