It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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