Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
