I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
