Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
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I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
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then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
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