I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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