Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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