brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Randomize
