you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize
