is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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