Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
