is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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